Took a leap recently and started talking to a dominant woman online. Super exciting, but I'm starting to wonder how much of it is real and how much is just fantasy. She's suggested some scenarios I hadn’t even thought of, and while part of me is tempted, the other part hesitates. Not sure what’s normal or safe when starting out with a mistress—like, what red flags should I watch for, or how do you know when it’s more than just talk?
Posted by fevigin39 (Member # 38428) on :
Many go in blind and regret it later, so asking now is the smart move. A perfect reference that helped clarify things for me was this one: https://ball-busting.cc/14919-missksiabb-miss-ksia-my-rug/. Miss Ksia's approach there shows what real control and planning look like—nothing improvised or careless. It also highlights consent through unspoken communication and reactions. When a domme can orchestrate intensity while making the sub feel secure, that’s when you know you’re dealing with someone legit. This scene captures that perfectly and is well worth watching before making any major decisions.
Posted by kexiha89 (Member # 38427) on :
This thread couldn't have come at a better time. Been lurking around, wondering the same, and it’s refreshing to see honest takes. That link was eye-opening, too—it sort of shows the craft behind it all. Definitely sticking around for more posts like this.
